MPW’s Super Mean Alter Ego
Posted in At Home and tagged with Duff, MPW on 01/25/2010 08:00 am by JennMy Partner Will (MPW) is really one of the nicest guys I have ever met. I mean, he is super nice. He is the first one to volunteer his help when someone needs help refinishing their basement, the first one to go and help set up a computer system, the first one to go and help fix someone’s car, well, you get the picture. 
Over the years he has told me stories about things he has said to people that just seem so uncharacteristic of him. Finally I put two and two together and I now understand what is going on. Here is what finally made it click.
MPW is a computer programmer. After work on Friday he came home in a foul mood because someone blamed him for something going wrong. He tells me the story in this way. “This girl on a team sent me this email about the way the shipping was set up on the program and how it can’t be done like that. I was like ‘we talked about this so many times. I asked you what you wanted and I did that. This is your problem.’ As I was writing the email my boss came over and said, ‘You are going to kill her aren’t you?’ and I was like ‘yeah’. ”
At this point I felt the need to interrupt. “Wait, wait, wait. You told your boss you were going to kill her?” “Yeah” MPW said. I thought about it and said “your email was really nice wasn’t it?” “No!” He said haughtily.
“Will, you wouldn’t even tell the guy at the store you didn’t like the shirt and tie combo he picked out for you. Be honest, you just wrote her a polite email saying ‘I’m sorry you feel that it is wrong, but that was outlined in the contract and I can’t stray from that.’” I said.
Pause.
“So what if I did?” MPW responds (somewhat embarrassed).
“Awww,” I teased, “I would love to meet the Will in your head. He is so bad ass and sounds like so much fun.”
I know MPW is super nice, all my friends know he is super nice, but in his head he thinks he is super snarky and tough. I imagine in his head Bad Ass Will looks a lot like this:
Joaquin Pheonix
I think I’ll call him Duff.
Yeah, That Just Happened!
January 25th, 2010 at 10:28 am
mpw’s bad ass self also looks a lot like zach galafranakis. I am kind of glad people arent as mean in real life as they are in their head… that would make me feel sad
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Jenn Reply:
January 25th, 2010 at 10:49 am
Who looks a lot like Joaquin Pheonix (the rapper).
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January 25th, 2010 at 2:59 pm
zach galafanakis is from the hangover, the original one man wolf pack. also has an interesting appeal to him.
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January 25th, 2010 at 3:24 pm
Hahahahahha “Will, you wouldn’t even tell the guy at the store you didn’t like the shirt and tie combo he picked out for you.” HILARIOUS and “Wait, wait, wait. You told your boss you were going to kill her?” “Yeah”
lOl
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Jenn Reply:
January 25th, 2010 at 3:28 pm
It’s so true! He has this alter ego he thinks is badass…but he’s not.
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January 25th, 2010 at 8:29 pm
Awwww…let him think he is a bad ass. He is probably just trying to turn you on!
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January 26th, 2010 at 5:04 am
Hehe this is so funny, I think I know someone who has an alter ego too! Maybe I should think of a name for him as well.
Jade
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January 26th, 2010 at 11:25 am
Awwwwww, how cute. He gives people the business in his head. Ah ha ha. My hub is the same way. He’s sweet as pie and his alter ego only comes out behind closed doors when he tells me what he should have said.
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Jenn Reply:
January 26th, 2010 at 12:20 pm
It’s always “next time…” isn’t it? At the end of the day I am glad they are sweet in real life.
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February 12th, 2010 at 2:58 am
Its Ok Will – your bad ass self can hang out with my bad ass self. I am sure they are on the same level ;-P
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